Ten Things...

...I Have Learned Through a Life of Consumerism

10. Books have stayed the same for hundreds of years. Electronic readers will be different by next week.

9. I know when it's real, and Wendy's isn't it.

8. Nobody ever really asks before declaring something to be "America's favorite."

7. It's totally worth it to add another item on your order to qualify for free shipping—even if said item costs three times the standard shipping rates.

6. Every movie franchise that stalled after one sequel will be revived to take advantage of the current 3D fad (i.e. Men In Black 3D, xXx 3D).

5. There will always be another "One Day Only!" clearance sale at JCPenney.

4. You can put a price on anything (i.e. Charlie Brown's Christmas tree, a symbol decrying the over-commercialization of the season, can be purchased at Hobby Lobby for $19.95).

3. Something can't be "world famous" if you've never heard of it. (i.e. the world famous Pillow Talk Motel in Wellington, UT).

2. Comcast, DirecTV, and Dish Network all have more HD channels than each other. Read the fine print to find out how.

1. Never shop at Walmart on a Saturday.


Jessica said...

charlie browns christmas tree was only 9.99 yesterday at shopko ;)

Cheeseboy said...

I think the JC Penney sale is actually an every day thing.