9.11.2009

Ten Things...

...That Will Happen by the Year 2015

Just so you know, these fearless predictions are based on a top secret, yet very reliable source. If anyone else has a prediction they would like to make, be sure to leave it in the comments so it can be properly recorded.

10. Stacks of soon-to-be obsolete LaserDiscs will line our alleyways.

9. You might as well quit law school now. All lawyers are due to be abolished.

8. Two words: dehydrated pizza.

7. Clothes will be auto-fitting and self-drying. And if you think that's cool, wait 'til you see the sneakers with power laces.

6. State of the art rejuvenation clinics will offer treatments such as hair repair and organ replacement, and can potentially add 30 or 40 years to your life.

5. Fifteen additional Jaws sequels are set to be released, and this time it's really, really personal.

4. Pets (or maybe toddlers?) can be kept in suspended animation kennels while you are away. They won't even know you're gone.

3. Every room in your house will have a fax machine—even the bathroom.

2. The Florida Marlins will move to the American League, change their name to the Miami Gators, and lose to the Chicago Cubs in the 2015 World Series.

1. Hover technology will finally reach the mainstream. You will be able to hover convert your old road car into a skyway flyer for $39,999.95.

4 comments:

Ben said...

I personally can't wait for the split ties, the Pepsi Perfect, the Cafe 80s, the futuristic robot voice when filling up my hover-car at the Texaco, and the introduction of "holograms"—be it on my hat or just walking around. Oh and don't forget to watch out for tranks, lobos, and zipheads.

Steve-o said...

Voice activated televisions that allow you to watch 32 channels at once, dogs that walk themselves, the in-home drop down produce platter right above the table & who needs Texaco when your car will run on any handful of trash you can find?

Dave said...

I would also like an electronic voice to greet me as "Lord of the Manor" and "King of the Castle" every night when I get home from work.

Krissy said...

I look forward to being able to pay for everything using only my thumbprint. So much more convenient than these pesky cards we carry around...

Plus, I think that video games that don't require you to use your hands will keep our kids from spreading so many germs when they decide to play Wild Gunman at the Cafe 80's.